Revisions

In my paper I tried to remember that the audience was not in the story I was telling. So I tried telling readers about two different situations that would show readers how confused i was. One of the examples I changed was ending the last sentence in my thesis. I did not want to trow readers off because my peer partner told me that she was confused by my intro and body. She stated " I thought the teacher in your introduction was the same teacher that you talked about in the body." I did not want my audience to think that so I tried directing the fact that I had my seventh grade teacher and my high-school avid teacher.

In the paper I also added the sentence about how it was the year which we were working on personal statements. It was hard for me to connect the intro and body because I and my peer talked about how confusing it was to jump from one story to the next. Just so that the reader can have a reminder of how at the time I was in high school. I really didn't change much in my description because I though it was fine. Well my peer partner said I had good description through out the paper.

Reading my paper I noticed how I tend to use the same words . I also was uncertain if some of the sentences could have been shorter. I know as a writer it is very difficult for me to stick to the thesis statement without jumping to another topic. With this paper I tried to maintain on how confused I was in writing.

3 Writing Ideas

3 Writing Ideas

• One of the ideas I would like to write about is this brown wooden frame , with a beautiful blossomed rose , and a Spanish poem on it. Every morning it became a habit for me to run to my mothers arms and read her the poem. It said the love of a mother is like a rose always blossoming and always loving. My mother always had a big smile on her face , when i read it to her.

-I believe it would be a good idea because I was introduced to poetry this way. It would be a great way to show how I became so in love with writing poetry.

-One of the cons is that I believe I would be jumping from learning to write poetry and learning to perform in a poetry slam.

• Another Idea that comes to mind is when I became less confident with my writing. When i was young writing was so simple, but as I grew older that changed in my eyes. I had teachers telling positive and encouraging words, that when I heard one teacher say not so good stuff about my writing, it brought me terrible doubts. It seem like just yesterday this all happened, a memory that still seems to be a burden.

-Pro: It would be a good idea because as a child i remember going home running to my mother and showing her the A , On my writing papers. It brought so much happiness that I believe I can show readers how much I was into writing.

-Con: I feel as if uncertain parts I will get stuck in how to make it all flow together , that I might confuse readers.

• The last idea I would say is joining the writing center. I was going through a roller coaster with writing. I would be confident, then not confident and there I was a tutor at a writing center. The first time was an awkward silence, I did not know how to really interact, or how to even start. All I remember was feeling hot, and nervous because she was waiting on me to give her a response. When i gave her feedback it seemed that her face became red, so I tried to make a joke or something to break the tension.

-Pro- I feel like I can make the audience feel as if they were in my position. Also I believe I can amuse readers with the experiences I had with other students.

-Con- Writing about this might feel like there is a lot of repeating going on throughout the writing.

Writing Confidence

As a child I still remember been so enthusiastic to write a paper. At that age I believed I had strong writing. I remember teachers always complimenting me about the stories I wrote. But that all changed when I reached my freshman year of high school. I had an avid teacher for at least four years, and writing papers for her wasn't easy.

"Janet what do you mean by this sentence? Can you go deeper into this.? Does the body connect with the thesis statement.? " she questioned me every time she would peer edit my paper. Feeling overwhelmed because my other teachers would give me As on my papers, but she wanted more. At that point I kept telling myself obviously my writing most be poorly written if she always makes me redo a paper.

That all changed until i was a junior in high school. My avid teacher had told me I should join the writing center. I thought how could i join the writing center when my writing isn't all that good. Soon she had convinced me and I was now a tutor. Peer editing other students work made me improve greatly. I started writing everyday to improve my writing, until i graduated. I now had confidence in my writing.

Taking English 101 , is giving me the opportunity to have my writing confidence again. Once again i feel like i write poorly because of the time I took off of school, and stopped writing. Missing a whole semester due to working at night shift i was no longer focused on writing. I had to take a developmental class because I decided to work before the pretest at Northeastern. the class i took was to easy for me, I didn't even try, and still maintained an A in that class. I didn't feel enough challenge, until this semester of English 101.

English 101 class will prepare me for college writing because i still feel like I'm writing in a high school level. I just want to feel proud of my papers , like I did when I was younger.